Blog Post #7: An Inch Closer

Well, more than an inch.

I’m catching up! I am still behind in my modeling class, but the upcoming assignment is a self portrait, so I’m going to two-birds-one-stone just use the head and neck of Alice (my MC) for it— since I modeled the face after mine. That should give me some breathing room to catch up more.

I was really concerned that I wouldn’t have enough work to show this sprint— since I presented last week— but I actually managed to get almost 20 hours of work done for this project during the past week! Big wins.

Let’s get into it.

T. 10/22/2o24

Let’s see... I reworked the Rachel blockout. I also finished the blog post due tomorrow, and made a rather lackluster slideshow for my missed Sprint 3.
I also played Elderfield about 30 minutes more tonight. And, wow, it’s just a demo— but there’s so much going on in that game! There are a multitude of quests— some interacting with others, like the Ben/Pumpkid vs. Babysitting one— the areas are really intriguing, and it finds a way to work in this really subtle narrative— through dialogue and the radio/weather reports.

W. 10/23/2o24

I presented for Milestone 3 in class today. In Studio, I felt prepared and competent. I do need to get a lunchbox or something, because my lunches of two lemon zest Luna bars, a can of pineapple juice, and a handful of granola is not cutting it.

Later. 

I came back to the grad studio after eating dinner (at like 4pm) to work on modeling the MC for my Seminar project, Alice. I worked on it for about three hours. It’s 8pm now. Modeling still isn’t fun, but at least I got all of the mirror modifiers to work as expected. I got everything done except for the arms and hands. I might just copy the ones from Rachel on, and resize them. 

I used the Pomodoro technique again, taking breaks to work on The Mongrel Sings. I didn’t get very far— just like a page. Things are starting to pop off plot-wise, though! I get to really expand upon the mystical second-language world— which provides ample opportunity to indulge in experiential consistency and soft worldbuilding. 

I looked into RPG Maker more (for Crossed Stars, my space RPG). I found this tutorial on creating airships that you can enter from the broader map. You can also fly that ship around the map— it likewise demonstrated how this technique basically creates a new map that is the inside of the airship. All of this could be very useful— if I decide to purchase RPG Maker and make it in that. 

I also watched a short video on making real-time combat (instead of turn-based)— which I would use for ship combat. I cannot find that video again, unfortunately, but there are others out there that I can reference, going forward. 

I’m heavily leaning towards using RPG Maker— primarily because it is purportedly very beginner-friendly. I don’t have time or energy to learn coding or blueprints right now, so anything that helps, well, helps.

Later.

I finished the draft of the third chapter of The Mongrel Sings. Chaos unfolded, and answers will be revealed. I started chapter four. 30 pages so far. I’m excited that— now that the World of the Second Language— the Mundi Secundi, for short— will be revealed to Algonale, I can dive deep into details that expand the worldbuilding in ways that do not make sense except in this story. Whimdark. Experiential consistency. Soft worldbuilding.

Sa. 10/26/2o24

I don’t know where the days went. It does not seem like three days have gone since I last worked. But when I look back over my journaling from Thursday to today, no work is reported as having been done— except for today. I worked on my overdue totem pole assignment more for Organic Modeling. I also finished blocking out the MC (Alice) for this project. I just imported the arms from the Rachel model, deleted one, resized the remaining, and mirrored (I had to do this because the shoulder breadth is wider than Rachel). I also resized the entire model so that he’s now 6 ft. tall. (30 minutes)

Oh you know, I do remember what I worked on yesterday. I am making an updated/v.2 version of Wanderer’s Guide to Dromknost. I realized that the Botanist replicator subclass is missing the Botanical Cutting stat block— which is central to that subclass. The Botanist is one of my favorite subclasses in the book, so I definitely want to update the Amazon manuscript and digital copy to include that stat block. And, since I’m doing that, I might as well include the Stalker fighter subclass and the Hexling rogue subclass. 

Unfortunately, I accidentally deleted the InDesign file for the book when I was trying to make space on my laptop (before upgrading the storage). So I have to reformat the entire thing. At least, then, I can format it so that the inner margins aren’t as close to the spine as they were in the original version.

Su. 10/27/2o24

I- uh- I’ve been doing some theoretical work to try and get my life in order. One such thing is building a new keystone habit. “Keystone habits” are habits that affect other areas of your life. The one I’m supposedly developing is fitness. I say “supposedly” because I did all of this planning last night— figuring out which days I can go to the gym on campus, the hours of said gym, and which days that won’t work into my schedule; also picking a suitable cue (such as waking up, i.e. doing it as the first part of the day)— but “supposedly” because I had my exercise clothes laid out, I woke up at the alarm honestly feeling like it would not feel physically great to go back to sleep— but I went back to bed, and got up at 2pm. And I felt bad— physically. 

The days I have class in the morning are the two days that I, therefore, cannot go to the gym in the morning— but I planned out the other five days. I’ve been so focused on only doing enough exercise to keep my body looking aesthetic— but with fasting, I honestly don’t have to do much at all. This didn’t used to be the case. Back in high school, I was on the Olympic Training Plan for pole vault, and I didn’t give a damn about how I looked; I just cared about performance. Since leaving that sport, my mindset has been slowly changing towards what it is now. 

And I realize— writing this— that this mindset about fitness isn’t just tied to fitness. This “bare-minimum” for superficial reasons mindset has applied itself to my creative work. I take such pride in being a creative, and it’s one of my highest valued qualities in myself— if not the highest. But I think that I’ve just been doing enough to be able to say that about myself. When was the last time I completed a complex work of art? Years. How much time am I devoting to my craft here at grad school? A shockingly small amount. I think a better quality to value would be integrity. Because then, at least, I would believe in myself, and know that I am what I say I am. 

So maybe fitness really is the ideal keystone habit to develop. It has roots that go deep into my psyche. 

As I am documenting this thought process in writing, I feel guilt. And shame. And I know that “happiness causes increased productivity,” and that “we learn better when we’re happy”— but I’ve done a lot to try and fix myself over the past two decades— including self-compassion— and I think there’s definitely something to be said for brutally honest self-inventory. 

This sprint I’ll only be documenting one week of work— since I presented last week, as a result of being behind. But I’d prefer to assume that, despite any accommodations I will be receiving, I’m still expected to have those minimum eight hours of work done this sprint. I have maybe 1 hour of work done on Pareidolia. So in the next few days before presenting Wednesday morning, I need to get at least 7 hours of work done. I also need to start sculpting Rachel for Spooky Horsey House— and we have our virtual meeting tomorrow night. And I’m still not finished with my totem pole for my Organic Modeling class— now three weeks late. I finally reworked the individual, smaller components into one mesh that I can remesh and add the wooden texture to. I’m attaching an image below. 

It’s supposed to be a mongoose on top (Taako). Kinda looks more like a mouse. I might rework it.

If I want to reach the point of automaticity for my new habit of fitness, doing it everyday will prove most effective. And if my cue is waking up (my mentor says that multiple cues is less effective), then I need to wake up early enough before class tomorrow morning so that I can go on a run or something. The gym doesn’t open early enough for me to go there before class. In undergrad, sometimes I would wake up at 5am or earlier to go to our school gym right when they opened. This school has a less opportune set of hours. 

And I know that exercise might not seem applicable to my Seminar project, but I truly think it is. How I do one thing is how I do everything— or how the saying goes. 

Yeah, so I’m going to journal, then shower; go to bed, and wake up early enough before class to work out. I have my intake meeting for accommodations tomorrow, as well. Mustn’t forget that. 

I’m tired of seeing my checklists largely unchecked; I want to build strength, not just a malnourished thin body with a defined jaw and ragged breaths at the top of the staircase.

Oh! My brother-in-law recommended taking magnesium supplements. He said that it helps with better sleep and less tiredness during the day. So I got that, and started taking it today. 

M. 10/28/2o24

(6 hours)

Phew what a day! I went to class (Modeling) (I almost didn’t go), I had my intake meeting for accommodations to help me catch up in classes, and I did a lot of sculpting. 

Here is what I did in class. The computers in the lab have an older version of ZBrush on them, so I couldn't work on my totem pole (Ezra recommended uploading an OBJ file to the cloud instead of a ZTool), but we started work on the next assignment (after the insect, which I still haven’t started)— a self portrait! I made that head without reference, and I’m pretty pleased with how it came out. 

The female model below is Rachel, for (working title) Spooky Horsey House.I spent like two hours working with the Rachel and the Alice models trying to get rid of these weird planar props connecting their heads to their wrists. I am counting those hours towards this. Eventually I fixed it— manifold-meshing, then re-exporting. With Rachel, there’s the issue of her thighs being fused together. 

Alice is further below. I referenced malnourished male models for the bones and musculature of the body, and I modeled the head after me! For the bones and muscles, I took inspiration from humans, but he is adventuring in a fairy tale land, so I exaggerated certain areas— and took some liberties with the details. 

Since I have to make a self-portrait for class, I think I’m going to just learn how to make hair for it, and use the Alice model— it is more refined than what I did in class today. Two birds, one stone. 

I still need to make clothes for Alice, and model the stone arm. Work for tomorrow! I spent two hours tonight on the Rachel sculpt and two hours on the Alice sculpt— I’m counting both of those for this Seminar project, because I started with Rachel, and applied the skills I gained doing it for the Alice sculpt. Oh, here’s a close-up of Alice!

I couldn’t get the RGB painting to work for the eyeball, so it remains red clay. I did get it to work both in class and for the Rachel model— I don’t know what was different with this model.

I was stressed about not having at least eight hours of work to show for this sprint, but looking back over my notes, I have at least nine hours dedicated just to the Alice sculpt (including troubleshooting and making the Rachel sculpt)— and I’m going to work on clothes tomorrow!

Well! It is officially tomorrow! I’ll check in— well, today!

T. 10/29/2o24

(7 hours)

I watched this tutorial on making realistic hair— going from ZBrush to Maya. It was really short and didn’t cover a lot; my research is just beginning. 

I looked up Maya. Jesus Christ is it expensive! I cannot afford that, and I’d prefer to stick with one program, rather than using its free trial and then having to learn another program. 

I searched for realistic hair tutorials for Blender, and found this one. It said “easily” in the title, but my god, was it a lot to follow. I didn’t understand most of it. Maybe I’ll work more efficiently tonight by just finishing the face, body, and modeling the stone arm. I’ll get to hair for the next milestone. 

I’m not sure which program I’ll use for the stone arm. I want it to thematically have similarities to the edifices of a gothic church. If I use Blender, I found this tutorial on using the knife tool. I’m leaning towards ZBrush, though.

Later.

I finished the base sculpt for the Rachel model for Spooky Horsey House— including the ears, which was fun, because I’ve never really done any art with defined ears before— and I modeled the stone arm for the MC of this project.  

I want it to be reminiscent of a Gothic church— the large steepled bits closer to the shoulder will have carvings to look like the stained glass windows of a cathedral’s façade. I haven't gotten to that yet. Modeling those steeples actually took a significant amount of work; I had to subdivide individual edges and F form new edges and planes between the vertices. It took two tries. 

I also kept the elbow section just as a slightly scaled up version of the organic elbow— I’m not sure how much it will deform in-engine when the arm bends, so I’m playing it safe. 

I will do the hand separately.